I am Yours,
& You are mine.
Ever since that song popped into my head a few mornings ago while I was searching for songs to do my QT to, I've been listening to it on repeat. It's such a beautiful song, and I think it resonates with me especially in this season. It's as though, my heart is somehow captured by the lyrics of the song, and that all I really want, is to surrender, to stand with arms wide open, just to let Him know that I want His way above mine.
But really, the best part is to know that I am fully His, and He is, just as wonderfully, amazingly, all mine.
It's taken me awhile to get to this point though, and the only reason why I'm writing this down is every so often, I want to remind myself that so much growth has come out of the last 3 months, when Deeper started. I was reflecting on it this morning and I remember how, broken and contrite my spirit was. And yet by taking that (very) small tentative step towards Him, with all my insecurities, loneliness and vulnerabilities laid bare, He very slowly drew me closer to His heart. Not all at once though, just enough, everyday, enough to know that if anything, He is capable of mending it, of mending me.
There's still so much uncertainty in the future, I constantly get asked questions about my direction that I have no answers to. But it's okay, I don't have to know all the answers. Right now, life is still messy, its still busy & hectic and exams have taken over my life. Every other day I still experience frustrations, like any other person would. I still go through periods where I feel small & alone, and I carry that hurt with me as I lay balled up in bed.
And yet, I find myself falling more in love with You, every single day. I think, I can finally understand what content is, it's not about having a perfect nothing-will-go-wrong life, it's about being able to rest in You, and Your love, and to know that even if things don't go the way I want them to, everything will be all right.
I know now, God. I know.
Thank You so much, for everything. I'm excited for the next chapter of my life to unfold, also because I can't wait to continue walking on this journey with You, right by my side.
